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Not Money Related

January 25th, 2009 at 05:30 pm

I am having a problem at work that makes me wonder about my future there. A particular co-worker frequently shows up at my desk and shouts in me in full view of members of the public and other co-workers. I have been working there nearly four years and a good portion of the time, this person seems normal and actually helpful, but it's like she turns into a different person and blames me for problems that are actually someone else's to deal with. Despite reporting to the boss about this, he doesn't seem to think this is a problem, but it seems like harassment. From what I have been able to find out my workplace does not seem to have rules against harassment that is not sexual or race-related, but they do have a conflict resolution procedure. My boss is at a conference, but when he comes back, my mentor and I will talk to him about what my options are. I am not sure what I should do. I really like living here and I love my job. I am keeping my fingers crossed while also putting aside extra savings just in case.

8 Responses to “Not Money Related”

  1. tynana Says:

    Can you say "hostile" work environment. If this person makes you feel uneasy then there is a problem that needs to be addressed. This person could be suffering some a type of mental illness that could turn out to be danger to co-workers.

    Lola

  2. Phenomenal Woman Says:

    It depends...

    Was this employee stressed out and overreacted or simply trying to pass the monkey on the back to you?

    Or was this employee was trying to make you feel bad on purpose, somewhat like an open sniper?

    If you can get to the root of the problem, you can drum up some responses that will either neutralize the situations or at least let this employee know how you feel and what she did was not okay. When you stand up for yourself without hostility, you show respect for yourself rather than keep it bottled up to only vent to the wrong person later. Tell the employee directly to not yell at you. If this person continues after that, it is definitely escalated to hostility or harassment issue.

  3. homebody Says:

    Is this coworker not your boss? Tell them to go screw themselves, that may shut them up. Oops that would probably be considered sexual harrassment, but that is what I would be tempted to do. Ooops did I just say that?

  4. whitestripe Says:

    oh dear. i hate that. i had a similar situation at my work - but i wasnt the one being yelled at, it was my friend. she would never say anything back to the guy because she is not the type of person. eventually my boss realised and had several talks with him (the last being 'do you want to work here?') now he is OVERLY nice, its weird! but atleast he is nice to her.

  5. crazyliblady Says:

    I wish I could say it was an isolated incident. She deliberately tries to make others feel bad for things that are either not their problem or out of their control. She has been there for about 20 years and as far as I know, has always been that way. I will get through it, though, as I have been through worse. Thanks for the support. Big Grin

  6. toyguy1963 Says:

    I like homebody's idea. I personally don't like ordered around even by bosses, but I accept it as best as I can. But when someone that is supposedly my equal tries to boss me around they see what the word temper means.

  7. Apprentice Fun-Frugalist Says:

    I agree totally with Phenomenal Woman....

    The next time this lady yells at you in public... go up to her 5 or 10 mins later in private and tell her you don't appreciate being yelled at in a calm manner.

    This is giving her a nice warning.

    If she takes the hint - great !

    If she doesn't, then you are free to invoke the official dispute resolution/harassment procedures.

    I know it is easier said here on a blog than done in real life. But it is the right thing to do. IMO.

  8. crazyliblady Says:

    Well, I was finally able to meet with my boss yesterday. He basically told me that he cannot do anything about the way my co-worker behaves or doesn't, as it were. However, the one thing he did tell me I can do is to walk away, just pick up my stuff and leave the area. It's not an ideal situation as far as I am concerned, but it is better than nothing.

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